I’ve seen many a things in my life, for never have I seen what I’m seeing today. I’ve seen kings cry before, I’ve seen kings get angry before and I’ve seen kings pity themselves before, but today’s sight was different. The kings of Hastinapur have never been seen so alone, so morose and so dejected. His shoulders were drooping, his eyes were full of tears and his face was fixated in a frown wondering on what could have happened if he had thrown aside the book of Dharma and instead embraced the arms of his evil cousins and uncle? But, that he couldn’t do, for he was dharma personified, he was Yudisthira, nah, King Yudhistira.
The first scene I recollect is that of King Shantanu crying inconsolably when he heard of the sacrifice made by his young prince, Devdrath. Devdrat made a terrible vow, a promise to be celibate his entire life so that his father could marry the daughter of a fisherman. Shantanu felt remorseful and worried about how history would judge him. I laughed then at his shortsightedness. For kings are not mere people who have to worry about their actions are being seen later, but instead ponder on how their actions impact history. And so it happened. The promise to continue the progeny of the fisherman’s family extinguished within a generation and the same Satyavati, who dreamt of her grand sons and great grandson’s sitting on the hastinapur throne was begging Devdrath, now called as Bheeshma for his terrible vow, to marry and continue the line of progeny. Bheeshma was adamant about not breaking his vow and again worried about his own deeds being seen in poor light in future, forgetting that his actions would impact history and the last thing he had to worry about was how history would see him.
Another era passed and another king sat on this throne. But, alas, he was crying too. He was crying because his dearest son threatened to kill himself if he wouldn’t invite his cousin for a game of dice. He tried to explain it to his son, but he wouldn’t listen. He had it all planned for him. He sent away the more popular pandavas to a far off location and had kept the crown jewel of hastinapur for himself and his kids. That was the plan and it succeeded. Why doesn’t his son see it, when he, being a blind man could see it so clearly? Duryodhan was always envious of his cousins and who could blame him? The king himself was jealous of his brother and his progeny. But, still, he never let it cloud his judgement and he learnt how to wait. May be it was easier for him because he was the helpless one, but, his son was helpless too. Bheema, the mighty one is only withholding himself because of his brother and he would gladly see the end of Duryodhan, if it were to come to that. How could he make his son understand?
If there was a time lower than this, I shudder to know what it could be. For even a courthouse like mine where in numerous kings, capable and incapable have ruled, it was the worst. It was the day of the treacherous dice. Some might argue that the pandavas called them treacherous because they didn’t know how to play, but still, what happened that day was the root cause of everything that happened after that. Everyone in that courtroom was aghast when Duryodhana ordered his brother to drag his cousin’s wife to the court hall. And that obedient wretch followed that order too. And so, I had to witness the shameful incident of a woman, a queen being disrobed in front of men, some of whom were her husbands, some who were her uncles, some who were even her grand fathers, sitting there helplessly with tears streaming down their cheeks. Never have I seen my courthouse with so many eminent, yet helpless people. And then oaths were made in anger, in agony and in anguish to destroy the entire clan and this entire race that had harbored that incident. Even I wanted to swallow that entire clan in that very instant and put to an end to all this! Alas, I couldn’t.
Lord only comes when there are tears in your eyes. Many years have passed after that day and that court hall was never the same. The evil kauravas and duryodhan were there, but there was never agian a smile in that court house. There was the pretence of justice being served but could there justice served when the entire atmosphere reeks of injustice? And in that moment, he entered. The one they say is the Lord vishnu himself entered that court. He could have entered there in a million occasions before this court was tainted, but he waited for some reason till it got tainted. And still, there was still some solace and succoor to those unfortunate souls who had to witness many gruesome incidents in that court. They got to see the true avatar of the lord, they got to see maha vishnu in all his splendor. Ah! even the blind king got to see that. Whatever be said, the blind king was a lucky one, for in his life, he had only seen the one thing that must be seen and for everything else is not worth seeing. If only he had deaf ears and he could only hear the words of the lord. We would have been in a different scenario altogether.
The unfortunate moment arrived. Yudhisthira entered the court, a court that had once been filled with his uncles, his grand fathers, his teachers and his cousins. And now it was all empty. Last time, he entered that court with full of pride and ego and he left that with his head drooped down so low that he was ashamed to face his own shadow. Now, he entered the court with a fractured and ruptured heart. The war that they pined for and longed for had ended. The victory that so desperately wanted arrived. The dharma that they wanted to upheld was upheld. But for what cost? He lost everything despite getting all the things he wanted. He lost his sons, his nephews, his uncles, his teachers and now he was facing another man, who was more unfortunate than him, his uncle, the erstwhile king, Dhrutharastra. He was begging him to continue to be the king and let him rule under him. The king refused flatly. And the argument continued. I moved way, for it doesn't; matter who rules the kingdom and who sits on that throne.
I do not belong there.
